15 year old Ana, said 'I thought he loved me because he wanted me all to himself. He wouldn’t let me talk to other guys and convinced me that I didn’t need my friends because I had him. If I did see my friends, he would fire questions at me about where I’d been, who with, and what we talked about, even what I wore. He’d go on at me about my clothes and would criticise me if I wore something he didn’t like or if he thought I looked like a ‘slut’. I felt like he was checking on me all the time. Gradually I stopped seeing friends as much, because it just wasn’t worth the stress afterwards. In the end it felt easier just to do what he wanted".
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Eva was physically abused by her boyfriend. "Once he dragged me out of the schoolground by my hair because he saw me talking to some guys my brother knew. He said he’d kill me if he caught me doing it again. I was really scared of him and embarrassed about everyone seeing him treat me like that, but I thought it was my fault because I knew he got jealous easily and I shouldn’t have spoken to them. I thought his jealousy was a sign that he loved me so much. My friends said I should just break up with him they kept saying "‘why do you stay with him?" like it was my fault. But they didn’t know how afraid I was of what he’d do if I left him"
Kylie was tired of justifying to Con why she didn’t want to have sex with him. "He would hassle me all the time and tell me that if I really loved him I’d have sex with him and that would be the ultimate show of how much we loved each other. I told him that I just didn’t feel ready. He just kept going on about how if I didn’t show him I loved him by having sex then he couldn’t go out with me any more. And he kept saying all his mates sleep with their girlfriends. One night I just gave in and let him do it, because I felt guilty like there was something wrong with me for not wanting to. A few weeks later he dumped me anyway."
"I used to think that it was my fault that he treated me bad. Once after I’d spent the night with another guy, he kicked me and punched me right in the face, and he said if I ever did anything like that again he’d kill me. I thought I deserved it because of what I’d done. But now I realise that even though he was hurt and angry, he didn’t have to abuse me like that. He could have talked to me about his feelings, or he could have just broken up with me and walked away. But instead he decided to abuse me, and he didn’t have to act that way."